Ugly Duckling Chronicles: It’s Not You, It’s Me

“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye.”

-Miss Piggy

Everyone’s had that “it’s not you,it’s me moment” right? If you haven’t, I’m soooooooo sarcastically happy for you. But me, I’ve had that more times than I can count on one hand. Which means it’s probably me at this point, but we not here to figure that out lol. Anyway. I came across one particular experience while going through my phone to delete old pictures, texts, music and emails so I don’t have to see that stupid ” Your icloud is almost full” message every day. I stumble upon a screen shot of a text message this guy sent me a couple years ago.  It wasn’t really an ugly duckling moment, but it was just as awkward!

To give you a brief backstory, this guy slid into my instagram DM’s and we ending up engaging in great conversation for a week or so, exchanged numbers and continued to talk. He then asked me on a date and I said YOLO. (Dating and meeting people now is soooo weird. But anyway a girls gotta eat right? JK JK I know guys get annoyed with paying for meals cuz they feel like girls use them for free dinner, but I’m not one of those people. All though I’m not gonna turn down food, especially if I enjoy your company, but thats beside the point).

So  we plan to meet up a couple days after he asks. Now I’m real nonchalant about it because the way my life is set up, something random ALWAYS happens and/or goes wrong. So I’m not really getting excited. The day of the date he calls and I’m like oh gosh he’s probably canceling because he forgot, or left town, or has a secret girlfriend that saw the text and now hes busted ( I’m not exaggerating cuz that stuff has actually happened to me SMH. I told y’all my life is a complete joke).

But actually he was just calling to say that the place he chose to make reservations has an event going on so we cant go there. Now I was low-key excited because it wasn’t Fridays or Applebees and he actually was making reservations. Nothing wrong with Fridays or Applebees. It’s just like the default place. I’m not bougie or anything and don’t ever expect expensive or fancy. Just….would rather not go to the “default” place.


He suggests another restaurant and I’m like OK cool I’ve never been. So after we agree to meet there, I google the place and see that it’s a fancy restaurant. Now i’m actually excited and nervous cuz it definitely wasn’t an Applebees/Fridays kinda place. So i’m stressing about what to wear, try on 50 million outfits, call my friends to talk it through and show them outfit ideas…. clearly I hadn’t been on a date in a while so the whole dating process was like almost new to me.

So I finally pick an outfit and meet the guy there. Continued with pretty good conversation. Food was great. It was a successful first date. The day after we decide to watch a movie. It was love Jones (cuz I was obsessed with that and brown sugar and had been watching movies like that for like 2 months straight on Netflix). So we watch it, he had a weird vibe, like he was in thought most of the movie. Afterwards I didn’t really hear from him for a couple of days, and then “THE” text message comes.



“….blah blah blah …just got out of a long term relationship when I first messaged you….blah blah blah….. still not over it…..blah blah blah…. you’re great [its not you, its me]…..Blah blah blah….can’t give you the attention you deserve….blah blah blah blah….I need space… blah “















angry mr krabs GIF by SpongeBob SquarePants


Like clearly you’re not gonna be over a long term relationship in a couple of days. SMH Just glad he didn’t waste anymore time making me a rebound…. But  I randomly found him on Facebook one day and saw that he was engaged…….


*** Kanye Shrug***














The Glow up is still real…

“Glow Up (v.) – To go from the bottom to the top to the point of disbelief. An incredible transformation.” – Urban Dictionary

This ugly duckling has definitely turned into a swan baby! I’m poppin’!

Back then they didn’t want me, BUT NOW….





















….they still don’t








Be Encouraged. Yea, some days you may feel like the ugly duckling, but it gets better at some point……eventually…one day



Related Posts:

The Ugly Duckling

Ugly Duckling Chronicles






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